Upgrading KDE

[Spiral Eyed Girl]

Hello, I am trying to upgrade KDE, using make install in the ports 
directory, and I get this error:

===>  kdelibs-3.3.0_2 conflicts with installed package(s):
      kdebase-3.1.4

      They install files into the same place.
      Please remove them first with pkg_delete(1).

and I try to do a "portupgrade kde" and get this error:

Stale dependency: kde-3.1.4 --> openldap-client-2.1.23 -- manually run 
'pkgdb -F' to fix, or specify -O to force.

How do I upgrade KDE without using pkg_delete? Or is that the only way to do 
it?

Thanks

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