docs/176355: Attribution and correction of quote in fortune
Kevin Rauwolf
sweetpea-freebsd at tentacle.net
Fri Feb 22 18:20:01 UTC 2013
>Number: 176355
>Category: docs
>Synopsis: Attribution and correction of quote in fortune
>Confidential: no
>Severity: non-critical
>Priority: low
>Responsible: freebsd-doc
>State: open
>Quarter:
>Keywords:
>Date-Required:
>Class: doc-bug
>Submitter-Id: current-users
>Arrival-Date: Fri Feb 22 18:20:00 UTC 2013
>Closed-Date:
>Last-Modified:
>Originator: Kevin Rauwolf
>Release: 9.1-STABLE
>Organization:
>Environment:
FreeBSD xxxxxx 9.1-STABLE FreeBSD 9.1-STABLE #0: Wed Jan 2 12:07:06 PST 2013 root at xxxxxxxx:/usr/obj/usr/src/sys/XXXXX amd64
>Description:
There's a personality test listed in the ports file. It's an excerpt from an Art Buchwald column from 1965, edited and unattributed. The patch included should update the the included text to match the original article.
For references, see http://goo.gl/lHMFo (Google News link to original syndicated article)
>How-To-Repeat:
N/A
>Fix:
Correct text to (also see patch):
Psychological testing in the United States government has come under
fire from several congressional committees, who feel that asking job
applicants a series of questions to gauge their personalities is an
invasion of privacy. The test that has come in for the most criticism is
the Minnesota multiphasic personality inventory, a 566 question true or
false quiz. As an answer to the MMPI, one of its critics has developed
the North Dakota null-hypothesis brain inventory, which the reader is
invited to take right now. Answer true or false:
1. I salivate at the sight of mittens.
2. If I go into the street, I'm apt to be bitten by a horse.
3. Some people never look at me.
4. Spinach makes me feel alone.
5. My sex life is A-okay.
6. When I look down from a high spot, I want to spit.
7. I like to kill mosquitoes.
8. Cousins are not to be trusted.
9. It makes me embarrassed to fall down.
10. I get nauseous from too much roller skating.
11. I think most people would cry to gain a point.
12. I cannot read or write.
13. I am bored by thoughts of death.
14. I become homicidal when people try to reason with me.
15. I would enjoy the work of a chicken flicker.
16. I am never startled by a fish.
17. My mother's uncle was a good man.
18. I don't like it when somebody is rotten.
19. People who break the law are wise guys.
20. I have never gone to pieces over the weekend.
21. I think beavers work too hard.
22. I use shoe polish to excess
23. God is love.
24. I like mannish children
25. I have always been disturbed by the size of Lincoln's ears.
26. I always let people get ahead of me at swimming pools.
27. Most of the time I go to sleep without saying good-by.
28. I am not afraid of picking up door knobs.
29. I believe I smell as good as most people.
30. Frantic screams make me nervous.
31. It's hard for me to say the right thing when I find myself in a room
full of mice.
32. I would never tell my nickname in a crisis.
33. A wide necktie is a sign of disease.
34. As a child I was deprived of licorice.
35. I would never shake hands with a gardener.
36. My eyes are always cold.
Now for the results. If you have answered more questions true than
false, you should work for the labor department.
If you have answered more questions false than true, you should try for
the peace corps.
If you answered 18 true and 18 false, you should apply for work with the
Voice of America.
If you refused to answer some of the questions, you might work for the
White House.
If you held your hand over the questions while you answered them, you
should go into the federal bureau of investigation.
If you talk about this test to anybody else, then you could never get a
security clearance and you'd better stay where you are.
-- Art Buchwald, 1965
Patch attached with submission follows:
--- fortunes 2013-01-02 11:57:54.078475249 -0800
+++ fortunes-patched 2013-02-22 10:11:08.476211384 -0800
@@ -10800,11 +10800,14 @@
When it is looked upon as vulgar, it will cease to be popular.
-- Oscar Wilde, "Intentions"
%
-As many of you know, I am taking a class here at UNC on Personality.
-One of the tests to determine personality in our book was so incredibly
-useful and interesting, I just had to share it.
-
-Answer each of the following items "true" or "false"
+Psychological testing in the United States government has come under
+fire from several congressional committees, who feel that asking job
+applicants a series of questions to gauge their personalities is an
+invasion of privacy. The test that has come in for the most criticism is
+the Minnesota multiphasic personality inventory, a 566 question true or
+false quiz. As an answer to the MMPI, one of its critics has developed
+the North Dakota null-hypothesis brain inventory, which the reader is
+invited to take right now. Answer true or false:
1. I salivate at the sight of mittens.
2. If I go into the street, I'm apt to be bitten by a horse.
@@ -10826,34 +10829,42 @@
18. I don't like it when somebody is rotten.
19. People who break the law are wise guys.
20. I have never gone to pieces over the weekend.
-%
-As many of you know, I am taking a class here at UNC on Personality.
-One of the tests to determine personality in our book was so incredibly
-useful and interesting, I just had to share it.
-
-Answer each of the following items "true" or "false"
-
- 1. I think beavers work too hard.
- 2. I use shoe polish to excess.
- 3. God is love.
- 4. I like mannish children.
- 5. I have always been disturbed by the sight of Lincoln's ears.
- 6. I always let people get ahead of me at swimming pools.
- 7. Most of the time I go to sleep without saying goodbye.
- 8. I am not afraid of picking up door knobs.
- 9. I believe I smell as good as most people.
-10. Frantic screams make me nervous.
-11. It's hard for me to say the right thing when I find myself in a room
+21. I think beavers work too hard.
+22. I use shoe polish to excess
+23. God is love.
+24. I like mannish children
+25. I have always been disturbed by the size of Lincoln's ears.
+26. I always let people get ahead of me at swimming pools.
+27. Most of the time I go to sleep without saying good-by.
+28. I am not afraid of picking up door knobs.
+29. I believe I smell as good as most people.
+30. Frantic screams make me nervous.
+31. It's hard for me to say the right thing when I find myself in a room
full of mice.
-12. I would never tell my nickname in a crisis.
-13. A wide necktie is a sign of disease.
-14. As a child I was deprived of licorice.
-15. I would never shake hands with a gardener.
-16. My eyes are always cold.
-17. Cousins are not to be trusted.
-18. When I look down from a high spot, I want to spit.
-19. I am never startled by a fish.
-20. I have never gone to pieces over the weekend.
+32. I would never tell my nickname in a crisis.
+33. A wide necktie is a sign of disease.
+34. As a child I was deprived of licorice.
+35. I would never shake hands with a gardener.
+36. My eyes are always cold.
+
+Now for the results. If you have answered more questions true than
+false, you should work for the labor department.
+
+If you have answered more questions false than true, you should try for
+the peace corps.
+
+If you answered 18 true and 18 false, you should apply for work with the
+Voice of America.
+
+If you refused to answer some of the questions, you might work for the
+White House.
+
+If you held your hand over the questions while you answered them, you
+should go into the federal bureau of investigation.
+
+If you talk about this test to anybody else, then you could never get a
+security clearance and you'd better stay where you are.
+ -- Art Buchwald, 1965
%
As me an' me marrer was readin' a tyape,
The tyape gave a shriek mark an' tried tae escyape;
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